Half Century

It's pretty weird to think I've been alive for fifty years now - a half century. I don't feel much different than I did when I was a teenager, if I can ignore the aches and pains. But when I look in the mirror, my hair isn't the original color - I'm not even sure I can remember what it used to be.  Now if I let it go, it would be white.

I have the same eyes - bright blue. My skin isn't too different if I ignore the wrinkles. I wasn't even aware I had so many until a teen from school took some up-close pictures of me yesterday. Scary!

When I look into the pre-teen Laury's eyes, I wonder if she had any idea she would ever be 50? A 50 year old woman working with special needs kids in a high school? That wasn't my plan. Did she know she would move to Tabor, IL and meet and marry the cute guy next door? I wonder what she would have thought of that? I wonder what she would have thought of the three kids she would have? I know I thought of my future husband and kids but it was distant, not real.

Who would think that in my 50th year I would be a grandma? That my youngest son would be so very independent so young? That my oldest would be almost 30? Now that's really weird!

These 50 years have been full and happy but not without pain. I'm hoping the next 50 will be much better.

"Consecrate the fiftieth year and proclaim liberty throughout 

the land to all its inhabitants. It shall be a jubilee for you;"  Leviticus 25:10

I proclaim this year - my 50th - to be my jubilee year. I've already started to eat healthier, to exercise, and to lose weight. I'm giving this year and every year to God. He navigates me through life much better than I can do it. I get too many bumps and bruises when I attempt it without Him. There are so many unknowns but God knows so I'm not going to worry. 

I wonder how many years I have left on this earth? 20? 30? 40? 1? Maybe a day? I know I'm ready, no matter how long. This half century year is going to be the best one yet - I just know it!