Two New Loves

Since I turned 50, I've developed different loves in my life.

These are the people I love and the things 

I have loved and continue to love:

I "love the Lord 'my' God with all 'my' heart and with all 'my' soul and with all 'my' mind and with all 'my' strength.' (Mark 12:30)

I love my husband and I will continue to love him until 'death us do part. It's not always easy and it's not always easy for him to put up with me, I'm sure of that - but we are in it for the long haul. I know, even if I forget to put gas in the car and I run out and he has to come get me - it's a forever love.  Even if I spend too much money on something like, let's say, ummmm...a bike - it's still a forever love.  We don't show it the same as we did when we were first married but it's more mature now and I like it.

I really love my kids - Ryan, Kristen, and Nik and Kristen has brought Jordan into the family and I'm loving him too.

Of course, I love my parents and brothers and sisters and Jim's family and always will.

I love love LOVE my job and the people and kids I work with. It makes it so much easier to get up each morning.

Okay, well - now that I've turned 50 - 

I have two more loves to add to my list.  

I have a cutie little grandson who I get to love on...lots! I'm so blessed to have him only live about two hours away. 

It's amazing, this connection I have with the little guy! He's six weeks old and 8#. He's growing slowly but I know it's just a matter of time before he shoots up and I'll be wondering where the little baby went. Already, I just missed one weekend and he's smiling a lot and staying awake more.

I love being a grandma! Honestly, it's way better than I ever thought it would be.

The next love in my life, my kids don't understand. I barely understand it.  I LOVE riding my bike! I'll get home from school, grab a Medifast bar and some water, and then I'll take off to parts unknown. I rarely go the same way twice. I keep finding new roads to explore. It is fun to finally find an exercise that I love to do - that I LONG to do.  It also draws me closer to God as I experience His creation.

I've lost 40 plus pounds now since July and I am changing - from the inside out.  Medifast has been the vehicle to help me lose the weight and has given me the energy to hop on my bike and go GO GO!!! Even Medifast was appointed to me by God and is a story in and of itself.

Since I started riding the last of July, I've logged 379 miles - my longest was done at the Prairie Pedal - 42 miles at one time.  I'm on my second bike. I didn't realize when I bought my first bike that I would want one I could ride for long periods of time.  Last weekend, I chose a bike that would let me do just that and since then, I've put 91 miles on it.  You see, I LOVE it!  And I'm not quite sure what drew me to it except maybe it was God.

So you see, now that I'm 50, I have some things figured out a little bit better.  I'm getting this eating thing down and I'm losing weight and exercising. I am living life to the fullest and loving hard and strong!

I'm loving being 50!  
LOVE LOVE LOVE it!

Read more...

Hello, My Name Is...

Hello, my name is Laury. That's me to the left. Wasn't I cute in my glory days? Not a care in the world. All the cares were left to my young parents. You see,  I'm the daughter of Larry and Dixie Holman. They were married at a very young age: 17 and 16. A year later they had this cute little bundle of joy.

The year I was born, 1963, JFK was assassinated. I don't remember that, of course, but I know it was a major event. The 60's were pretty eventful but my parent's kept me safe.  They sheltered me.  They took me to church and I grew up knowing about God and when I was in grade school, I accepted Jesus as my Lord and Savior.

But...as time goes on, things weren't as simple as they were when I was young and sheltered by my daddy.  I was out in the world and started making my own decisions. I'd say I haven't done too bad.

I got married to the guy next door, Jim.  We moved right smack in between our two parent's houses.  I remember my little sister coming over and asking if Jim could come out and play. That was a long time ago.  Seasons have come and gone.  Those little sisters and brother all ended up living with us at one time or another.  They chose a rougher road than I did.  Weird that we all grew up in that same home with the same parents.

In the course of time, we moved across the road and then we moved back across to where we live now.  Jim has NEVER EVER been out of this little place called Tabor.  We raised and kicked out of the nest three kids: Ryan, Kristen, and last but not least, Nik. They're okay as far as kids go.  Just kidding. We love them lots and think they're the best.  And now Kristen is married and starting to raise up her own little family.  Funny how life continues to multiply...

All that is behind me now.  I'm in a new phase.  Let me introduce myself.

Hello, my name is:

Now that's the problem.  I don't quite know who or what I am anymore.  The kids are gone.  The whole upstairs is empty.  Just Jim and I here and this summer, I'm alone all day long.  So weird.  Alone.  I love it.  I hate it.  I got pregnant right away after we were married so we really didn't have much time to be just us.

Our whole married lives were centered around our kids and their schedules.  
Now, suddenly...it's not.

During all this transitioning, I had a hysterectomy which helped lots of my emotional problems I was having but still...not all.  I wake up some days and wonder who exactly am I?  I deduce that I am me, whoever me is.  But who is me?

Hello, my name is:

• Lost
• Broken
• Fat
• Lazy
• Stupid
• Untalented
• Friendless
• Lonely
• Unmotivated

Should I go on?

I've had so many things knock me down.  I get back up only to get knocked down.  I try to remember the word is MENOPAUSE but it's still hard.  STILL HARD.  HARD.  And they are all names that satan wants me to call myself, not God.  Those names are all lies. God calls me His child.

God calls me Child of the One True King.

I think every woman can relate to Matthew West's song, My Name Is.  Just like my daddy took care of me and held me with such love in that picture above, God lavishes love on me.  He watches out for me every second unlike my earthly father could or can.  And He knows what's going on in my body and allows me to get help and I have.

And now, as I'm trying to lose weight AGAIN, after I don't know how many times I lose it and then gain it back, I know satan is going to whisper in my ear those words -

You can't do this - Quitter.

But I have to.  I have to be ready.  Stand strong.  Remember who I am.  What my name is.  And when the going gets tough.... I need to remember who I am:

Hello my name is:

Child of the one true King!

What's your name?

Read more...

See, I am doing a new thing!

Today starts my new journey.  I was approached about trying Medifast and I accepted the challenge - for 30 days, at least.  I've known for about a week now and during this time, I've been reading up on their website and on the foods.  I've also been eating up all the contraband in the house.  Last night, I had my 'last pizza.' On the 4th, we went to DQ and I had my 'last blizzard.'  It's really pathetic how I'm thinking.  It's a good thing my order came finally, because I'm to the point now where the 'lasts' keep coming up and it's getting really old -I'm so done.  I'm ready to forge on ahead to a healthier body. I'm eating more now than I regularly eat just because I know I won't be able to soon.  See?

Pa-the-tic!

While I waited, I Googled other women's blogs about their weight loss journeys with Medifast.  I'm not sure that was a good idea because now I'm scared.  Some were encouraging.  Some weren't.  That's to be expected, I suppose.  But at least every blog I read said the food was good.  That's the most important thing.  The foods must be good.  :)  I have to be on my own though, for one meal a day.  The lean and green meal.  That's a little scary.  I think the easiest will be to just do the meat and the vegetables at first.  Basic.  That's the plan.

That's my food order.  It came yesterday when Nik was home.  He wasn't impressed.  He's trying to gain weight.  Oh to be young and thin.  Sigh...  I can do this.  I have great willpower when I want it.  When I'm challenged.  I can always rise to a challenge.

I've lost weight in the past but then life happens and I turn to food to get myself through it.  That is a very dumb thing to do and it doesn't help.  All it does is make me feel bad about myself and make my body feel very out of whack.  I'm going to be 50 in August.  Oh my!  That's next month.  Wow!  Okay.  Now is as good a time as any to start moving forward on many things in my life, not just food.

In order to do that, move forward I mean, I have to let God be in control of every part of my life.  Last night a portion of a verse was floating in my mind and I found it.  I'm claiming it this month as mine.  To stand on.  To hold onto, even as the wind blows and tries to knock me off course.

“Forget the former things;

do not dwell on the past.

See, I am doing a new thing!

Now it springs up; do you not perceive it?

I am making a way in the wilderness

and streams in the wasteland." --  Isaiah 43:18, 19 NIV

Mari did such a good job on my blog header that it still fits my life after all this time.  On this new phase on my journey, I will need lots and lots of patience, strength, a great deal of hope and courage to continue on when I want to quit.  So here goes!  The journey has started...

Read more...