Chaos and Clutter

>> Saturday, November 1, 2008

I'm sitting on the couch. I've laid on the bed. I've thought about my story for a week now. I've taken notes. I've researched. I've gotten so excited to do my NaNo project, and now I'm choking. How can I have writer's block already? Oh boy. Such a big project to take on: 50,000 words in one month. What am I doing? I have no doubt that I'll get things figured out soon. I need to pray more and let God at the helm. I think that's what I'm supposed to be learning right now.

My project title is: Free To Be...

and here is the snyopsis:

A woman lost in a sea of expectations. Beaten and bruised from the past, she stuffs and stuffs until she is so far inside herself that she withdraws. Unknowingly, she builds a cocoon around herself so no one can enter, so no one can hurt her ever again. Until one day God brings into her life... a friend. Through much laughter and tears, she begins to understand what it is to be, "Free To Be..."
I've been asked to be a voice to pastor's wives. They have such a hard job. Have you ever thought about that? They have to be all things to EVERYONE. That shouldn't be the case but in many instances it is. They have very busy lives outside of the church, just like the rest of us, yet many times they are expected to play the piano, teach Sunday School, plan the next Ladies' Night Out, put up with well-meaning church goers who complain about the pk's behavior... Need I go on? I don't think so.

Many times these women carry around baggage with them from the past that defines how they react to different stressors in their lives. My goal is to write my NaNo novel as a fictionalized account of one pastor's wife learning to be free to be whatever it is that she was meant to be.

Okay, this is where you come in. I need at least 1600 words a day to achieve my goal. I really want to do this. I need to finish a project for once (that's important to the ADD part of me that comes up with great ideas and then fails to follow-through) It's also important to create an awareness that our pastor's wives are real live people that have no place sitting on a throne in our minds. Lift them up in prayer. Find ways to help them out. Encourage them with cards or phone calls. Maybe make them a meal. We just finished pastor appreciation month but it should happen every day, for both the pastor and his wife and children.

I would love your prayer support and encouragement. I want to do this justice. Thank you in advance. I know many are already praying.

On another note: my contentment blog entries are coming back to bite me! I found out today that Mari and I did not win the cruise. The woman that did win TOTALLY DESERVED IT. I am so glad she won, really truly. I am content with the results. I didn't start out that way, though. I cried and whined but now I am good. God is good. He knows everyone's needs. He knows this woman NEEDS to get away. I am thankful that Mari is going to come to Illinois to see me. Now that we know the results we can start to plan. This will be so much better and very much cheaper.

Just like Paul, every life lesson draws me closer to the One that created me. He holds my hand as I maneuver my way around the chaos and clutter. I am so thankful for that. I am content. I am happy.

And speaking of chaos and clutter -- oh my goodness. I'm already a horrible house cleaner -- what am I going to do as I attempt to keep up on my writing goal? The house will fall apart all around me and I might not even notice. Not until my husband mentions it, though, I'm sure. Oh boy. Clutter and chaos -- please pray that God shows my husband how to be content with extra clutter and chaos and help him maneuver around it all:) Actually it might be cleaner than normal when I use my household chores as a reason to procrastinate:)

I am procrastinating right this very minute. As of now, I have 1,387 worthless words on my word processor. I need to get it together and quickly. Thank you for praying. I appreciate you all so very much.

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